Hell is other people
The world we live in is becoming more and more modernised and connected but still we seem to lose our social values, like fraternity and modernity. We are not the first ones in history to see such a decline of our principles: let’s not forget the Third Reich, the war in Bosnia, Donald Trump and the ongoing Jihadism - or it’s opposite xenophobia. They all have one thing in common: the belief that the ‘other’ is responsible for my misfortune and my woe is the result of the existence of the ‘one’, of the ‘one I blame’.
Let's first of all return to some basics psychoanalytic theories. Human is by nature a social animal and by all means individuals exist only in relationship to others. According to Winnicott, "a baby alone does not exist" which in fact highlights the important role of the otherness in the development of oneself's identity: existence is only acknowledged if granted by others. To become a subject one must be named as such and 'I am' will only be said if 'you are' is told. Identity then grows by defining limits; that's me, that's you, that's mine, that's yours. Lacan also sheds light on this concept in the theory of the Mirror Stage. It is clear that the other not only defines myself but that I am defined because of this other. In “Being and Nothingness”, Sartre refers to the other as an incident that changes my perception of the world: when walking in a park everything changes when another person appears. Someone else’s existence reminds me that I am a foreign entity too and my identity is then determined as both object and subject. The Other’s look upon me modifies my own views on myself. As we all
crave for recognition of our own existence as a part of mankind, the Other has power over us, as it is the one to grant us the affiliation.
But, of this Other I do not know anything. Hegel refers to the relationship of the Other as a struggle. The Other is an enigmatic consciousness and therefore a potential threat that might want to hurt me to secure its place in the world, just as I might want to hurt it to secure mine. We pass each other but we never meet. Davereux supports the theory, blaming the construction of our civilisation. By valuing personal success rather than collective interest, we esteem the smaller community - the one we feel part of, either it is defined by national, ethnic or religious factors - stronger than the concept of humanity. Unfortunately empathy within humans does not seem to exist on a large scale as we dismiss what we dont understand and what we judge as different is often judged as less: less of me, less of mankind. This goes along with the idea that humanity not only wishes to be but also possess and ejects what it can not get, in every senses of the term.. And to cope with the frightening fact of getting shut out of the circle of mankind, the blame is put on the things farthest away from me – the other one from another culture or religion.
Humanity is a shared mirror in which everyone of us gives and receives the right to belong to mankind by recognition of each other. If we look alike then we must be part of the same gang. The issue in this unconscious construction of one's identity within a community is that our references of identification are arbitrary and created by our pairs. Humanity has defined itself in opposition to animality and what is different from me is naturally pushed towards the animal kingdom
in order to avoid the risk to be determined as such myself. Indeed, the truth does not lie in the unconscious fear of the wild man but in the fear of my own depravation of my status of civil man. Therefore what I don't recognise is rejected to avoid the unthinkable thought that could totter my entire self. As it is easier to live if the cause of any trouble is out of my sphere of identification, we create a space where 'foreign' can exist without collapsing our own world. In particularly monstrous events such as the ones we have been experiencing lately where sayings such as 'this is inhuman' or 'people are monsters' are claimed., it is good to remember that humanity has never owned the panache of good consciousness unfortunately. As a matter of fact, what distresses the most is that inhuman actions are done by humans.
However, we live in a time where centuries of human experience are thought to have taught us better. “He who is different from me does not impoverish me – he enriches me” says Saint-Exupéry and it is time to fight the primary fears responsible for racism and civilisation clashes. Recognise others' differences as strengths rather than weaknesses could be viewed as an act that reveals my own beauty, says Levinas, as we will never be more human than when we authorise the others to share humanity with us. So,instead of giving statuses away, why not let people into our circle?
Text by Master Student in Clinical Psychology Maud Rannou.